Today was shit.

Today started with Joel telling me Jesse punched him, it was about 630… I got up and told them to go back to bed it’s to early for this. I tried to go back to sleep for a half hour… that didn’t happen my stomach started screaming at me. Once my eyes open I have to go 💩… I go to the bathroom with my morning cigarette.. praying I’ll get atleast some type of privacy this morning. That didn’t Happen. Fast forward i threw Jesse his clothes to him and told him to get dressed while I changed the other twos diapers and filled up cups for the morning we brushed our teeth and put Jesse on the bus. Our plans were to go to the doctors office and get Joel’s shots today since yesterday the office didn’t know there ass from there face.. we’ll same shit happened today. We sat for 45 mins past our appointment time. For the second day in a row. By this point I’m already pissed. I asked the receptionist how much longer will it be. She says just a few more minutes she’s finishing up with a patient. Twenty minutes goes by and my kids are being crazy. They wanna leave I want to leave so I ask for the shot records and tell them I’ll just switch doctors because they obviously don’t know what they are doing. I was so mad. We came home and I speed cleaned while the kids had nap time. Then I decided I was still pissed at the ignorance from the doctors office I went and cut the grass… after quiet time we picked Jesse up from school and went to the lake!! What was I thinking??! the boys had fun but they kept trying to die, my anxiety was through the entire roof! We let them swim for about a hour and then we decided to come home. I had taken some pork steak out they’d been marinating in the fridge for about 5 hours. My husband put them on the grill while I make Mac and cheese and brownies. The boys were exhausted and cranky.. so the afternoon went with me repeatedly asking them to go play or watch tv while I made dinner. Nope they want to help or climb in my fridge. I was at my whits end today. We all ate dinner and watched the new episode of the flash, the boys snuck off to there rooms and passed out… we showered and now I’m laying here in bed, watching how I met your mom. With all three of my fur babies laying at my feet.

Physically and mentally this day was exhausting. But emotionally I haven’t felt this positive in a long time. I feel happy. I feel dumb for getting so upset at the doctors office. This is the life of a poor mother of three boys. There’s always ups and down but being a boy mom is the best feeling. You’ll never know love until your loved by your son.

I pray for a easier tomorrow, but I’d never change today.

Love your self. Live life to the fullest. And never give up. ❤️

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